Love is crazy! There has been a time, when I cried continuously for hours. Why?; because I missed him. There was a time, I decided to give up. I knew that crying for someone, changing myself, and suffering constantly wasn't worth it for anyone. But in the back of my mind, I didn't want to stop loving him. The next day, after looking into his eyes as he spoke to me. I would fall in love all over again.
Everyday, whenever I saw that same girl near him, I would just begin to cry. I would question my chances with him. I would want to just run and hide. When I would see him smile and when I knew it wasn't for me.....it would hurt me so much.I would feel like I had just been punched in the gut a thousand times.
Although I have competition, whenever we talk to each other, it feels like it's only the two of us. Like we are the only ones in the world. Just the two of us.
I go through so much pain, and I have only one person to share my suffering with, but i know i will have a happily ever after. I know my troubles and my sorrow will come to an end. I know the there will be a day when he will walk up to me; hold my hands, look at me in the eyes and say...........
I Love You!
Wednesday, February 5, 2014
Sunday, March 24, 2013
Life Expirences
It was a normal windy Saturday. I was only a naive ten year old and my innocent and carefree sister was then, all of two yrs. My family and I were heading to Target. Apparently it was our first time going there, and just a week before, our close friends happened to inform us about how big and great the store is. So their words stayed in our heads. I was in the back right seat behind my mom listening to a few of my favorite stations and fighting with my sister over a brand new doll our parents bought for us. We were supposed to share !!! :)
Anyway as we arrived it started to rain and we scattered inside. Dad fetched a cart and strolled by my side. There were a lot of colors that day(because it was late December)I got attracted as fast as Benjamin Franklin's kite got struck by lighting... :P. So, did my mom, so now I am going to skip the parts where my mom coaxed my dad into buying her a necklace. BLAH ,BLAH ,BLAH.. After all that I remember we headed to the socks section. I was actually looking forward to buying socks because I really was running out of socks. Well I don't mean they were ripped they would just irritate me and roll down my foot.
Each sock was covered with patterns. I told my dad to watch my sister because she was out of the cart and I was going to help my mom (actually myself) find some socks.
We each took three pairs and I put them in the cart. Then, I looked around and casually asked my dad where was my little sis ?? He said she was with mom and even though I had a feeling that she wasn't I went and asked mom if she was with her. My mom replied a hands shaking 'NO', and I continued and told her that she wasn't with dad either. I could see my mom's pupil shrinking and her face turning a light shade of blue.
"She isn't with dad either"-Me
"What do mean she isn't with dad ?"-Mom
"I asked dad and he said she was with you"-Me
My mom and I went to dad and ---
"Isn't she with you"-Mom
"No I thought she was with you guys"-Dad
With a spark of panic my parents and I started looking all over the place. I knew that she was only a two year old and that she couldn't walk very fast so I started looking around a certain area. My parents where looking all over the place. I could see them talking to the staff for help and that's when I knew this was very bad.
I started thinking about the times I carried her. The loud laughs she would give. The funny expressions. The first time I fed her milk. The kisses I gave her and the wet kisses she would return. I went in circles but started losing more and more hope each time I returned the socks section. I started to cry. You wouldn't be able to tell me apart from Niagara Falls. Tears streamed down my cheeks like big balls of paint down a tall canvas. I started praying. I felt more and more like a "bad sister". I wanted to teach my sister so many things. I wanted to teach her about school. All the rights and wrongs. This couldn't be happening to me. I prayed and prayed. I didn't want to lose my sister. I wanted to hug her.Feel her narrow body against mine. I felt sick to my stomach. Unthinkable thoughts went through my head. What may happen if we don't find her. Things will be so different. Our lives will change.
Just then I stopped. What made me stop? I saw a tiny head poking out of the socks section. The cute little head made a wide grin, and a giggle. I started crying even more and got down on my knees. I hugged my sister and thanked god for ending our miseries. I gave her a bone crushing hug and started looking for my parents.
"Mom I found her"
"Mom, dad I found her, come quick"
Then I heard an another voice calling me.
"Did you find her"-Mom
"Yes"-Me
My parents came running and hugged my sister. I was so grateful. I looked at my her. She didn't even know what just happened.
Turns out she had to do potty in her diaper.So she needed a quiet area to do her business!(Can you believe it!)
Anyway as we arrived it started to rain and we scattered inside. Dad fetched a cart and strolled by my side. There were a lot of colors that day(because it was late December)I got attracted as fast as Benjamin Franklin's kite got struck by lighting... :P. So, did my mom, so now I am going to skip the parts where my mom coaxed my dad into buying her a necklace. BLAH ,BLAH ,BLAH.. After all that I remember we headed to the socks section. I was actually looking forward to buying socks because I really was running out of socks. Well I don't mean they were ripped they would just irritate me and roll down my foot.
Each sock was covered with patterns. I told my dad to watch my sister because she was out of the cart and I was going to help my mom (actually myself) find some socks.
We each took three pairs and I put them in the cart. Then, I looked around and casually asked my dad where was my little sis ?? He said she was with mom and even though I had a feeling that she wasn't I went and asked mom if she was with her. My mom replied a hands shaking 'NO', and I continued and told her that she wasn't with dad either. I could see my mom's pupil shrinking and her face turning a light shade of blue.
"She isn't with dad either"-Me
"What do mean she isn't with dad ?"-Mom
"I asked dad and he said she was with you"-Me
My mom and I went to dad and ---
"Isn't she with you"-Mom
"No I thought she was with you guys"-Dad
With a spark of panic my parents and I started looking all over the place. I knew that she was only a two year old and that she couldn't walk very fast so I started looking around a certain area. My parents where looking all over the place. I could see them talking to the staff for help and that's when I knew this was very bad.
I started thinking about the times I carried her. The loud laughs she would give. The funny expressions. The first time I fed her milk. The kisses I gave her and the wet kisses she would return. I went in circles but started losing more and more hope each time I returned the socks section. I started to cry. You wouldn't be able to tell me apart from Niagara Falls. Tears streamed down my cheeks like big balls of paint down a tall canvas. I started praying. I felt more and more like a "bad sister". I wanted to teach my sister so many things. I wanted to teach her about school. All the rights and wrongs. This couldn't be happening to me. I prayed and prayed. I didn't want to lose my sister. I wanted to hug her.Feel her narrow body against mine. I felt sick to my stomach. Unthinkable thoughts went through my head. What may happen if we don't find her. Things will be so different. Our lives will change.
Just then I stopped. What made me stop? I saw a tiny head poking out of the socks section. The cute little head made a wide grin, and a giggle. I started crying even more and got down on my knees. I hugged my sister and thanked god for ending our miseries. I gave her a bone crushing hug and started looking for my parents.
"Mom I found her"
"Mom, dad I found her, come quick"
Then I heard an another voice calling me.
"Did you find her"-Mom
"Yes"-Me
My parents came running and hugged my sister. I was so grateful. I looked at my her. She didn't even know what just happened.
Turns out she had to do potty in her diaper.So she needed a quiet area to do her business!(Can you believe it!)
Monday, June 25, 2012
How I found out she was pregnant
(i am sorry i don't remember the date.i tried calling my mom to see if she had been keeping track but she just wasted my time and finally said no.)
It was _______________and i was in my bedroom looking for my phone,suddenly i remembered that i had forgotten it in my parents room.So i causally looked around and i find a picture of a fetus laying by the mirror.I get all excited and dart to the kitchen.
MY CONVERSATION WITH MY PARENTS-
"Hey mommy,who is this? "I handed her the picture.
"Is it me?'
"No" She said.My dad joined the conversation.(Actually he just stood by my mom's right side with his hand on his hip and a mug of coffee in the other.)
"hmm"he said taking a sip of coffee.
"Is it my cousin"
My mom shook her head.
I made a puzzled look on my face.
My mommy looked at my dad trying to do that thing in the movies.
My mommy looked at my dad he didn't look at her so she just blurted in out.
"You are going to be a big sister!"
So the main idea is that i didn't find my phone that day.=)
It was _______________and i was in my bedroom looking for my phone,suddenly i remembered that i had forgotten it in my parents room.So i causally looked around and i find a picture of a fetus laying by the mirror.I get all excited and dart to the kitchen.
MY CONVERSATION WITH MY PARENTS-
"Hey mommy,who is this? "I handed her the picture.
"Is it me?'
"No" She said.My dad joined the conversation.(Actually he just stood by my mom's right side with his hand on his hip and a mug of coffee in the other.)
"hmm"he said taking a sip of coffee.
"Is it my cousin"
My mom shook her head.
I made a puzzled look on my face.
My mommy looked at my dad trying to do that thing in the movies.
My mommy looked at my dad he didn't look at her so she just blurted in out.
"You are going to be a big sister!"
So the main idea is that i didn't find my phone that day.=)
Monday, June 4, 2012
i saw HER (this is ALL TRUE)
It was around my 4th birthday(August)and my grandma had died a week before.Tragic right.Imagine, the same person who took care of you,gave you quick baths and changed every single diaper ,gone before your eyes right before your 4th birthday:(
At least i got to see her for the last time.
(LETS PUT IT IN MY MOMS POINT OF VIEW it's more interesting that way)I remember i was cooking dinner when my daughter(me!) came running to me.
"mommy come,granny is here she is waiting for you please come."I was startled.Could my mom be here.She died a week ago.My daughter wouldn't lie, she is too young to be acting.She pulled me over.
"Where i don't see her"i took two more steps.
"NO DON'T GO FARTHER YOU WILL BUMP INTO HER! "She said
I thought she was just imagining her so i went continued cooking because i didn't want to cause any problem.
Later that night my younger brother came home and we all had dinner sitting in front of the TV. I was enjoying the food with my brother and i saw my daughter by the door.She was on her tipy toes and and she had her arms around a chuck of air.It almost looked like she was trying to hug someone. Then i heard her say
"i love you granny,thank you"i didn't know what to say so i just looked at my brother her had his mouth full of food and looked at me in a weird way.
Finally it was her birthday and she was wearing her favorite white dress.My family and i had planned the whole thing.We had decorated the room with balloons and birthday hats and banners.It was so colorful.So when she saw all the decorations.i could see it in her eyes something was wrong.She looked at the green chair in the corner of the room..She didn't move a muscle.Her smile faded.My daughter turned and looked at me.She bursted into tears.She demanded us to remove her dress and pop all the balloons.That birthday wasn't what we expected.She never threw a tantrum like that .I have never seen my daughter like that,....never.
A couple days later my daughter was in a better mood, at least she wasn't crying most of the time.I was with my dad talking to him about something.Then my daughter came running so my dad picked her up.She was holding a colorful beaded necklace.I asked her where she got it.She didn't answer.She just looked at my dad and said,
" grandpa you forgot to give this to me on my birthday."
I looked at my dad.His mouth was open,and he looked at me with tears in his eyes.
"How do you know about this?It was supposed to be a surprise"I said with a puzzled look
"Granny told me"
Weird right.Since then i really haven't seen her.But i do know my granny is somewhere here watching over us.
At least i got to see her for the last time.
(LETS PUT IT IN MY MOMS POINT OF VIEW it's more interesting that way)I remember i was cooking dinner when my daughter(me!) came running to me.
"mommy come,granny is here she is waiting for you please come."I was startled.Could my mom be here.She died a week ago.My daughter wouldn't lie, she is too young to be acting.She pulled me over.
"Where i don't see her"i took two more steps.
"NO DON'T GO FARTHER YOU WILL BUMP INTO HER! "She said
I thought she was just imagining her so i went continued cooking because i didn't want to cause any problem.
Later that night my younger brother came home and we all had dinner sitting in front of the TV. I was enjoying the food with my brother and i saw my daughter by the door.She was on her tipy toes and and she had her arms around a chuck of air.It almost looked like she was trying to hug someone. Then i heard her say
"i love you granny,thank you"i didn't know what to say so i just looked at my brother her had his mouth full of food and looked at me in a weird way.
Finally it was her birthday and she was wearing her favorite white dress.My family and i had planned the whole thing.We had decorated the room with balloons and birthday hats and banners.It was so colorful.So when she saw all the decorations.i could see it in her eyes something was wrong.She looked at the green chair in the corner of the room..She didn't move a muscle.Her smile faded.My daughter turned and looked at me.She bursted into tears.She demanded us to remove her dress and pop all the balloons.That birthday wasn't what we expected.She never threw a tantrum like that .I have never seen my daughter like that,....never.
A couple days later my daughter was in a better mood, at least she wasn't crying most of the time.I was with my dad talking to him about something.Then my daughter came running so my dad picked her up.She was holding a colorful beaded necklace.I asked her where she got it.She didn't answer.She just looked at my dad and said,
" grandpa you forgot to give this to me on my birthday."
I looked at my dad.His mouth was open,and he looked at me with tears in his eyes.
"How do you know about this?It was supposed to be a surprise"I said with a puzzled look
"Granny told me"
Weird right.Since then i really haven't seen her.But i do know my granny is somewhere here watching over us.
I LOVE YOU GRANNY
Monday, May 21, 2012
Emma's glasses
This is a story for kids hope they enjoy
One morning,Emma ran down her stairs.She grabbed her bright yellow jacket,blue shiny purse and her yellow sunglasses.Emma was ready to go out.
Emma jumped on her bike and rode faster than a spider monkey on a sugar high.She took out her grocery list, and read it out loud.
"OK i have to buy one gallon of milk,a dozen eggs and a chunk of bread."
When Emma reached Walmart She parked her bike against a brick wall and darted inside.
Emma went straight to the milk section pushing a heavy cart. She dropped the milk into the cart and strolled to the eggs section.
She carried a dozen eggs and put it in the cart.She afterwards went to the wheat section and hugged a chunk of bread.
After Emma's shopping trip was over she made sure she had everything.
MILK check
BREAD check
EGGS check
PURSE check
JACKET check
SUNGLASSES uh uh um ...NOT CHECK !!!!
Emma didn't know what to do. She rummaged through her things.Looked through every part of the store.Under carts,in trash cans, even in bathrooms,(even the boys bathroom)
Emma had no where else to look until she had to give up and head home.Emma rode on her bike slower than a starving snail in the middle of the desert.
Emma looked up at the stars and felt as if she had done something awful .She went inside with a thousand bricks fallen on her back. Emma pushed herself on her couch.She drank a glass of warm milk while watching her favorite show Spongebob Squarepants.Suddenly a gust of wind skipped her and she felt chilly.So Emma zipped up her jacket and put on her hood.
She felt something fall on her lap it was
!!HER SUNGLASSES!!
One morning,Emma ran down her stairs.She grabbed her bright yellow jacket,blue shiny purse and her yellow sunglasses.Emma was ready to go out.
Emma jumped on her bike and rode faster than a spider monkey on a sugar high.She took out her grocery list, and read it out loud.
"OK i have to buy one gallon of milk,a dozen eggs and a chunk of bread."
When Emma reached Walmart She parked her bike against a brick wall and darted inside.
Emma went straight to the milk section pushing a heavy cart. She dropped the milk into the cart and strolled to the eggs section.
She carried a dozen eggs and put it in the cart.She afterwards went to the wheat section and hugged a chunk of bread.
After Emma's shopping trip was over she made sure she had everything.
MILK check
BREAD check
EGGS check
PURSE check
JACKET check
SUNGLASSES uh uh um ...NOT CHECK !!!!
Emma didn't know what to do. She rummaged through her things.Looked through every part of the store.Under carts,in trash cans, even in bathrooms,(even the boys bathroom)
Emma had no where else to look until she had to give up and head home.Emma rode on her bike slower than a starving snail in the middle of the desert.
Emma looked up at the stars and felt as if she had done something awful .She went inside with a thousand bricks fallen on her back. Emma pushed herself on her couch.She drank a glass of warm milk while watching her favorite show Spongebob Squarepants.Suddenly a gust of wind skipped her and she felt chilly.So Emma zipped up her jacket and put on her hood.
She felt something fall on her lap it was
!!HER SUNGLASSES!!
Friday, May 11, 2012
Happy Mothers Day
who is there when you are hurt
who is there when you need advice
who is there when you are in stress
who is there when you need confidence
when you need inspiration
when you need to be encouraged
who is there when you are in pain
who is there when you are in trouble
cherish every time she is there for you because
there will be a time when she can't help you anymore
Give her a day of her own.
Happy Mothers Day.
who is there when you need advice
who is there when you are in stress
who is there when you need confidence
when you need inspiration
when you need to be encouraged
who is there when you are in pain
who is there when you are in trouble
cherish every time she is there for you because
there will be a time when she can't help you anymore
Give her a day of her own.
Happy Mothers Day.
Thursday, May 3, 2012
A German Story
Das Mädchen ist shön . Sie ist zenh Sie hat lange haare. Sie heisst Michelle. Michelle wonht in eine gross haus in berlin .
Michelle geht zu der bank.sie nimmt 100.000 euro.
Michelle sieht der dieb.Der dieb nimmt Michelle geld! Oh nein! Aber, Michelle ist intelligent .Sie macht eine foto.Michelle seiht der foto.
Das dieb hat klien brille.Das dieb hat bleu augyen.Das dieb hat kruzt haare.
Michelle sagt ,pöliztist, pöliztist !"
Das pöliztist geht nach Michelle schnell.Michelle gibt das foto zu pöliztist.Das pöliztist ist guckliht.
Das dieb geht zu New Jersey.Das Michelle und poliztist geht nach New Jersey ouch.
Das dieb wohnt in eine klein haus, und er hat das geld.
Das pöliztist geht ihem das haus.
Das dieb sagt,Oh nein!" und er rennt schnell.
Das pöliztist sagt ,Halt!"und das dieb halt.
Das dieb gibt das geld zu Michelle,und Michelle laht.Das dieb ist nicht fröh.Aber Michelle ist fröh, unddas poliztist ist fröh.Das dieb weint.
Das Ende
[ This is the story of a 10 year old Intelligent Girl,who casually goes to the Bank unaware of a thief. This thief makes an appearance and steals her 100,000 Euro.The story goes on to show, how she deals with the thief and gets her cash back !
Michelle geht zu der bank.sie nimmt 100.000 euro.
Michelle sieht der dieb.Der dieb nimmt Michelle geld! Oh nein! Aber, Michelle ist intelligent .Sie macht eine foto.Michelle seiht der foto.
Das dieb hat klien brille.Das dieb hat bleu augyen.Das dieb hat kruzt haare.
Michelle sagt ,pöliztist, pöliztist !"
Das pöliztist geht nach Michelle schnell.Michelle gibt das foto zu pöliztist.Das pöliztist ist guckliht.
Das dieb geht zu New Jersey.Das Michelle und poliztist geht nach New Jersey ouch.
Das dieb wohnt in eine klein haus, und er hat das geld.
Das pöliztist geht ihem das haus.
Das dieb sagt,Oh nein!" und er rennt schnell.
Das pöliztist sagt ,Halt!"und das dieb halt.
Das dieb gibt das geld zu Michelle,und Michelle laht.Das dieb ist nicht fröh.Aber Michelle ist fröh, unddas poliztist ist fröh.Das dieb weint.
Das Ende
[ This is the story of a 10 year old Intelligent Girl,who casually goes to the Bank unaware of a thief. This thief makes an appearance and steals her 100,000 Euro.The story goes on to show, how she deals with the thief and gets her cash back !
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